I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
