i don't like sucking hair
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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