I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
When did angry sex become our thing?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
