So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
