At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Everyone says I win the strip club
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