Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
