holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
