You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
My feet surprised me
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
