she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize