oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Randomize
