their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Semen is not good for contacts.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I don't deserve a penis
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
