You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
