I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
