physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
i would punch a child for taco bell
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
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