He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
wakey wakey hands off snakey
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
