Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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