I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
and you fell through a lawn chair
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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