did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
