Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
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