Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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