i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
It's Friday. Sex?
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Randomize
