We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Randomize
