How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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