Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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