dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
one might say we're banned from that church
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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