I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
