I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
