No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
