He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
