Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
