dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
so much tequila, so little girl.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Randomize