i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
The Olympian is in my bed
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
