You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize