just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
