Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
