My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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