if you like me you must not know who I am
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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