I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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