Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize