I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
