you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
