Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
