Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Randomize
