Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
