I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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