this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
