She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I currently don't understand fingers.
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