everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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