I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
