So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Randomize
