people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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