And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
its liver damage thursday
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