So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
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